D&D Session 33 (1/12/22): Don't Touch It!

Text by Paul O'Connor, Dungeon Master  

It's not like Arthur had been up that ladder before and noticed something dangerous there. Actually ... he did. But it had been months! And the lads were confident in their unconfident perception rolls!

Next thing you know, Blah is hanging half off a ladder, chopping a Black Pudding into smaller Black Puddings, all of which are angry and hitting him in the face and spraying acid all over the place. 

Don't Touch It!

Fortunately, Arthur brought the fire, and Sommpher was on his game, and Khostov was locked and loaded with the Magic Missiles, so the monsters were dispatched without too much ado.

Back up the ladder and into some kind of store room. Oh, hey, a treasure chest! Arthur whispers in Blah's ear to open it up, but ...

... Don't Touch It!

That's right, a Mimic. Now Blah has one hand half pulled down the throat of the thing and is swinging wildly with his sword. And Arthur sees a swarm of Carrion Crawlers on the ceiling! Might have gone sideways if not for Khostov's Pipes Of Instantly Wrecking Any Encounter.

The room contained stacks of iron ingots and barrels of coal, which made sense when the room beyond revealed a kind of iron foundry. The foundry was cloaked in the dust of time but shiny Elven armor (Drow?) looked like it had been made yesterday. Sommpher couldn't resist touching the shiny shiny armor that certainly wouldn't come to life, but ...

... Don't Touch It! 

ALL the armor came to life, red light pouring from vision slits ... and a tentacled eyeball joined the party. Here we go!

D&D Session 32 (1/5/22): Who Rules Bartertown?

Text by Paul O'Connor, Dungeon Master  

A delight of a session where the heroes used their brains, powers, and assets to solve problems that had no pre-set solution.

Can't figure where that Vorpal Sword wound up? "Locate Object." Need to dive a thousand feet into a pool to get it? "Potion of Water Breathing." Want to pass unseen? "Cloak of Elvenkind." (Sorry, the Aboleth is psychic, but it was the thought that counted). (Literally). Want to check in with someone hundreds of feet away and under the water? "Sending." Awesome.

With such ingenuity, Blah recovered his sword and (just barely) eluded the Return of the Aboleth -- and the whole group wisely fled the dark pool chamber.

Equal ingenuity in transporting poor Arthur, who is consumed by a disease that practically demands he remained submerged in water -- filling a Bag of Holding with water did just the trick, and hanging that bag on Blah's back conjured images of Master Blaster. Who rules Bartertown?

Even an undead attack as the party retraced their steps avoided a bad ending with Sompher's quick Cleric-y ways -- Shadows and Vampiric Mist put paid to with a strong rebuke powered by the glory of the Silver Flame!

And now the crew is kind of back where they started -- still deep in a dungeon, still snowed in by the collapse of the castle above, now carting around a diseased halfling, but also bulging with treasure and optimistic that ladder they passed a couple sessions back will lead them out of this hole and not to ... the Drow.

D&D Session 31 (12/29/21): Pool Party

 

Text by Paul O'Connor, Dungeon Master 

Ha! Ho! There's the Kua-Toa done with. This is easy!

Whaddya mean there's a "thing" in the pool?

OH MY GOD!

So we've got a swirling mass of tentacles and teeth, along with a whale-tail that promised instant death (but never quite connected). And maybe the worst part was the thing was psychic, and malevolent. It got into our heroes' heads. Sarkagan was driven half mad, blubbering about a solipsistic crisis. And Arthur was transported back to his childhood halfling hole, where he saw his dear old mum again (who was definitely not his mum).

How did they handle it? Like heroes, of course! Arthur took it to the creature, leaping into the pool and stabbing again at those three ancient, intelligent, evil eyes, all lined up one atop the other like some chaotic traffic light. Blah jumped into the fray, cutting at every tentacle that came his way, pounding his chest and bellowing for more. (Oops, there goes his vorpal sword, lost in the pool). Sompher lifted spirits, restored HP, and comically wielded his spiritual weapon. Even Sarkagan returned from his earlier existential exit to lob magic missiles from the top of the stair.

Running short on spells, weapons lost, health failing, it looked bad for our boys ... but then, just like that, The Thing (an Aboleth, for those of you scoring at home) decided it had had enough, and retreated into the murky depths, but not before
trying (and failing) to drag Arthur down with him.

Eerie silence, in the aftermath of battle ... and then tempered celebration, with Farrah rescued at last, and a nice little treasure to divide. Blah dove a time or two to recover his lost sword, then shrugged it off with barbarian fatalism. "Good thing I never gave it a name!" Dee Dah gave up munching on a fallen Kua-Toa to comfort his master.

But Arthur ... oh, Arthur ... what is this strange disease that has taken root in your halfling heart? Your skin is turning translucent, your black veins seem closer to the surface, your eyes are growing wide and luminous, and you find that to be separated from water feels like acid is being poured on your skin. Uh oh.

Long rest! At last!

(And congrats to our group for playing 30+ times in 50-ish weeks this year. Achievement Unlocked! It's a good thing we are all married already).

D&D Session 30 (12/15/21): Always Read The Fine Print!

Text by Paul O'Connor, Dungeon Master 

Following the trail of the Kua-Toa, the gang discovered the sandy pink shores of an underground pool, surrounded by the shattered statues of forgotten ... DROW GODS! Run away!

(But they didn't).

Behind a waterfall, Arthur found a comically outclassed specter.

From the bottom of the underground pool, Blah unearthed a water-tight cask, within which were three scrolls. Score for Sarkagan!

Ah, but continuing deeper into the complex, the lads found something truly magical -- the statues of Rathomer and Ivanon, near-forgotten Drow gods, lit by magical fire. Reading the fine print, the boys put the right fire in the correct upturned palms and -- behold! A magic door opens!

Beyond the door, with a magical admonishment that there would be only one priceless magical item to a customer. Two sarcophagi, a wand and a mace. Sommpher went for the mace, which was at least a different color than his current magic mace, and slightly improved his position with Jenny, who'd been looking daggers at the cleric ever since he suggested abandoning the hunt for Farrah, who is clearly dead by now ...

... and as if on cue, they find Farrah! Yes, she's in a cage, and that cage is suspended above a pool, and something horrible is in the pool, and the pool is surrounded by enraged Kua-Toa, and the threat of purple worms and dark elves hangs over everything, but she is definitely NOT dead. Yet.

D&D Session Postponement over the holidays...

... So thought I would post this image until we get back to playing again...

Left to Right: Sommpher Wilde the half elf cleric:  Blah the half orc barbarian (with owl bear cub DeeDah); Arthur Twopenny the halfling rogue, and Khostov Sarkagan the human wizard.

D&D Session 29 (11/10/21): Plumbing The Depths Part Two

Text by Paul O'Connor, Dungeon Master 

The lads make camp for the night, during which Blah single-handedly beheads and BBQs an umber hulk. What a night!

The next day, back through the secret path and on the track of Farrah. Up a winding path, crossing over a dark and fast-flowing river. They intersect an ancient purple worm tunnel.

Khostov suffers one of his fits of madness, loudly proclaiming how "nothing happened!" when he was alone and in the dark with an unconscious Blah. He gets louder, and louder.

Breaking into a waterfall chamber with twin cyclopean stairs, Khostov glides high and ahead of everyone, taunting his fellows with some bullshit.

Khostov is jumped by a flock of darkmantles. His last words are a triumphant declaration that "This IS an old-school D&D dungeon."

Blah leaps to his half-brother's defense as the darkmantles tear strips from the hovering body, cloaked in magical inky darkness.

Sommpher dispels the darkness, and the crew drives away the darkmantles. Khostov's lifeless body hits the stone.

But ... he's only mostly dead. A bit of healing and Khostov is right as rain.

Hopefully no more toilets loom ahead!

D@D Session 29 (11/10/21): Plumbing The Depths Part One

 Text by Paul O'Connor, Dungeon Master 

WHERE'S FARRAH? Picking up the trail of the Kuo-Toa, the gang follows tracks back to an inky pool where an underground stream emerges.

These heroes have faced giants, shipwreck, dragons, and death itself, but nothing vexed them quite so much as an underground toilet.

Angry at the realization that Farrah was likely carried down into the depths and on to who knows what, the crew slaughtered their Kua-Toa prisoners for catharsis.

Some shenanigans later,  Arthur and Blah find themselves in a dark grotto, isolated from their fellows, Blah is unconscious, Arthur is mostly naked but has a glowing dagger for warmth. Arthur finds a little, ill-hidden "secret" tunnel but elects not to explore it. (Hilarity will ensue).

Khostov has a moment of insane insight, displaces water from the pond with a Thunderwave, then blasts it out the grotto end with a Gust of Wind -- hurling himself into the tunnel, he emerges from the water in the grotto like a sub-launched Polaris missile. The water backfills.

Now on HIS own, Sommpher turns a skeletal swarm using his spooky cleric powers, which is enough to win Jenny's affections.

Blah wakes up, but he is in darkness with his pals. Khostov is out of spells. They stumble about a bit, follow the secret path, and find it leads back to an overlook near the pond. They interrupt Sommpher and Jenny, snogging.

Well.